My number one DBT skill for Christmas

What skill will I be using for Christmas? Cope Ahead is the one that clients definitely use. We as clinicians use this too! 

Christmas is often presented to clients as fun with their families - but it rarely is. Usually someone gets drunk or obnoxious and ends up wearing their dinner. Or worse! (See the emotional movie released last year based on the Paul Kelly song “How To Make Gravy”)

So how are you going to manage that? Cope Ahead will be your friend.

Cope Ahead is an Emotion Regulation skills designed to reduce our vulnerability to emotions.

Cope Ahead will look different for everyone and every situation. It means having a plan beforehand of how to cope (not catastrophise) and then rehearsing that plan as best you can.

You might:

· Practice an exit strategy from the room or the party

· Go the toilet every time your racist aunt says something horrible

· Take your kids for a walk to look at the Christmas decorations

· Throw your drink into the potplant so you have an excuse to go get another

· Offer to bring a dish so you know there will be something that you can eat there

· Bring an easy game like Uno or Pictionary to keep distracted

· Have a time limit: staying 4 days with family only, or 4-hours max with very challenging family

If you haven’t already, spend some time preparing for Christmas by practising your own Cope Ahead.